I've been there. I dated a guy for a while who happened to be my first anal experience and it did turn into a huge control issue. So much so that when I first tried it with my guy, I freaked out for about a month and lost all interest in sex. Take it slow, girl. He's willing to wait and that's great. When you do decide to go for it (because it sounds like you are pretty interested in trying again) wait for a time when he's done something really sweet for you- it'll help prove to yourself that he's nothing like the bad guys in the past. Best of luck

__________________
I am certain of nothing but the holiness of the heart's affections and the truth of imagination. What the imagination seizes as beauty must be truth - whether it existed before or not.
-John Keats