Groupies can be identified by…....the amount of skin showing backstage

my first trip to an adult video store resulted in

My first trip to an adult video store resulted in.......my getting a job there and selling a strap-on to 85 y/o man! (you've no idea the story behind that one!)

And when I die.......and when I'm dead, dead and gone.....there'll be...............

*****(and no just singing the rest of the damn song either!)

And when I die.......and when I'm dead, dead and gone.....there'll be............... a big ass grave to dig


Bury my heart at...... ( no fair saying Wounded Knee)

Bury my heart at........ the same place you bury the rest of my body.


Don't sit too close to......

Don't sit too close to ... a person who has drunk 8 bottles of beer and ate 4 helpings of beans.


Some say the worth of a man can be measured by ...

... the warmth in his heart and the balance in his checkbook. :)

By the way, Lilith, could we have answered "Bury my heart at ... injured shinbone?" Just asking. :D :D

Good sex begins with ...

Good sex begins with a shopping list consisting of : condoms, velcro, woodglue.

And yes, this is based on an actual incident.

I've been shovelling so much snow lately that...

I've been shovelling so much snow lately that ... I realize it may have been wiser to use something other than my daughter's plastic toy shovel.

Lawyers are most likely to…

Groupies can be identified by ... the number of feet sticking out of the pile.

Oral sex is ...

Oral sex is ... physical therapy for a loose tongue and flapping lips.


After a rather uninspired bout of sex, the woman said ...

... maybe I should have sat on an ice cube.

Arriving at work early, the employee said ...

Arriving at work early, the employee said ...
..."well kiss my ass and call me Sue, if I go to work now, they'll owe me overtime too.

Eating health foods is ...

Eating health foods is ... often having food for the body ... but not the soul. :)

Having a noonday quickie is ...

Having a noonday quickie is ... mmmmm, extremely nice!


Having 'wake-up' sex is.....

Having 'wake-up' sex is.....mmmmm, extremely nice, too! (Remember copying is the most sincere form of flattery. :D)